darkness
by tatty ted
Summary: Poppy Lawson begins at Waterloo Road Comprehensive with her sister Matilda Jones. Like Matilda, Poppy finds her first day at the comprehensive difficult especially as she has a toddler and a dead fiance in the mix. But Poppy will get through it she has no choice too but will her first year be as she hoped? - —OC. [two/four]
1. i

A/N: Here's the sequel to _Through My Heart_. This time, I'm going to write the story from Poppy's perspective.

I glanced at the clock in the bedroom, the time just over ten past six in the morning and I sighed deeply. Today was my first day at Waterloo Road with my sister Matilda and my mother Kim Campbell. I didn't really want to go, I'd rather spend my days sat at home with my daughter Kim. But if I wanted to give Kim a better life then me, I needed some qualifications. However, the thought of been away from her for a few hours made me cry. I sat up in bed, running my hand through my brunette locks as my eyes darted across the bedroom and fell upon my sleeping daughter.

I loved been a mother more then anything yet I couldn't help but crave the independence of many teenagers out there. I'd love to be able to go to a party, get drunk and for the evening forget about my daughter but I couldn't. Kim was my responsibility, my flesh and blood and if anything happened to her, I'd never be able to forgive myself. I gently got out of bed before I walked to the bedroom door, pulled it open and stepped out into the landing leaving the door ajar.

I wondered if anyone else was up in the house and as I passed the bathroom, I heard someone throwing up. I had a good idea who. I reckon it was Matilda, I knew she'd been _ill_ these past couple of days but she just claimed she had a bug. A bug my arse, she was pregnant. I said the same excuse when my adoptive parents heard me throwing up in the toilet until I confessed that I was indeed having a baby.

It was a shock for both me and my adoptive parents. Yes I was sexually active but I took precautions to ensure I wouldn't get pregnant. Not only did we use a condom but I was on the pill, I guess something didn't work. Our relationship was wonderful, he was everything a teenage lad wasn't. He was caring, considerate and when he found out I was pregnant, he promised to stand by me.

That was until I was four months pregnant. Him and his friends were out driving when they lost control of their car, overturned it and ended up in a ditch. Three of them survived but my boyfriend didn't, he was killed instantly. I even considered the possibility of a termination knowing that without his support I wouldn't be able to carry on the pregnancy full term. I viewed his body in the morgue, it didn't look like he was dead. He just looked like he was sleeping.

His parents and I buried him in London, where he was born and brought up. We played his favourite song in church you know, Dancing in the Dark by DJ Cammy. He always told me when he was alive that the song reminded him off me. I placed a scan photo of our baby in the coffin, along with a few other bits and bobs mainly photos of me and him and photos of his parents.

After the funeral, my life was a blurr. Depression started and now matter how many times I tried to focus on the arrival of our child, I couldn't. Then one evening I was clearing out my bedroom when I stumbled upon a letter, hidden in my bottom draw. I instantly knew who had written it, it was Dave's handwritting. I bit my lower lip as I opened the letter and began to read.

He told me everything I already knew. That he loved me and our baby and he'll always be there for us both. He told me that if he died tomorrow, he'd always look out for us both and that I'd be the only one he'll ever love. To be honest, the way he wrote the letter was like he knew he was going to die and that hurt me more. At the end of the letter, he told me to look downstairs on the fireplace. I did just that!

There was a small box on the fireplace, a box I hadn't noticed before. It was hardly suprising seeing as I tried to avoid been in the house. The memories Dave and I shared in the house made me even more depressed so I often stayed out. It wasn't good for me or the baby. I picked up the box, opened it and gasped at what was inside. There was a beautiful diamond ring inside with another little note.

_To my beautiful darling, marry me?_

I never even thought he'd ask me to marry him. I was young, only fourteen and been pregnant was the last thing I ever wanted. However, with a ring and his love, I knew I could do anything. I looked up at the blue sky, smiled and whispered, "I'll marry you, forever and always." And that, was the one thing that helped me carry on. I sat down on the bottom step, the ring around my neck like it always was. I didn't like been apart from it, it was the only thing that kept me close to Dave.


	2. ii

A/N: I'm going to _attempt_ to update this fanfiction every other day.  
But who knows, I might get distracted by my other fanfic (:  
_RIP Stacey Cartwright'(L)_

I didn't expect anyone to be awake so I got a heart attack when I walked into the kitchen. Kim was stood by the counter, arms folded across her chest and her back slightly turned towards the kettle. I quitely pulled out the chair from the table, not wanting to give her a heart attack like she had done to me.

"Morning." I said gently. She still jumped out of her skin, dropping the mug on the lino.

"Jesus Poppy, you scared the living daylights out of me."

I laughed gently, "Sorry! Do you want me to help you clean that up?"

"No, no its fine." She nodded towards the kettle, "Do you want one?"

"If your offering." I replied with a smile, "Tea, one sugar please."

She put the broken mug in the dustbin, turned on the kettle and waited for it to boil. We didn't speak to one another, I just sat there playing with my fingers. Eventually, Kim spoke;

"It's you who hates coffee right?" I nodded. I hated the taste and the smell of coffee whereas Matilda hated the taste and the smell of tea.

"I can't stand coffee, she can't stand tea."

Kim made us our brews and then sat down at the table opposite. I held the mug in my hands nearly dropping It once i realised how hot it actually was.

"How come your awake?"

I shrugged my shoulders staying silent for a moment, "I was dreaming about Dave."

"You know you've never spoken to me about him."

"There's nothing to say." I replied softly, "I was pregnant, he died and I had no choice but to grow up."

I hated talking about Dave, I can't explain how it feels. It just upsets me more thinking about what we could be.

"You loved him didn't you?"

I nodded, "Of course I loved him. Me, him and our baby, we were gonna be a proper family-"

There was a silence, "I'm just going to check on Kim."

I left my cup of tea on the table, walked upstairs and went back into the bedroom. I lay down on the bed, tears streaming down my face. I always cried if I spoke about Dave. I loved him, he loved me. Together we could have been the perfect family, got married and had plenty more children but one mistake caused us everything. Everyday that goes by, Kim starts to look like Dave and it hurts because he isn't here to see his little girl grow up. He's up there with god and we're down here, struggling to cope without him.


	3. iii

A/N: If anyone noticed I deleted my other fan fiction _Fragile Flower  
_because I think I was stupid for writing two at the same time.

Today (23/24 December) my brother was rushed to hospital with  
suspected bronchitis. This has since been confirmed by the hospital  
and he's had to stay in overnight to monitor his breathing and stuff.  
My parents and I are worried that he might not be home for Christmas.  
I will keep everyone updated if I hear anything new (:

* * *

Before long it was time to wake Kim up. She was a nightmare to wake in the morning, she was definitely one of those girls who loved their sleep. Eventually I woke her up, got her out of bed and carried her downstairs to the kitchen. Kim was sat at the table in the same place as before. She looked up when she saw Kim and I walk into the kitchen and smiled,

"I didn't upset you earlier did I?"

She asked. I shook my head and told her that I had gone to check on Kim and had fallen asleep for a bit. Did I ever mention that I - unlike my sister - was one of the worlds worst liars? I told my mother this lie whilst looking to the left, an indication that I was lying. She didn't question my excuse and I sat Kim down in her highchair before walking over to the toaster. I put in two slices of bread, one for me and one for Kim before sitting on the counter. I just rocked my legs back and forth not speaking until I saw the state of my sister at the table. She was as pale as ever before,

"Still ill are we?" She glared at me from the table, a soft smirk upon my face. She knew I knew she wasn't ill, she knew I knew she was pregnant. She knew I'd eventually grass to mum, "Don't you think you should go to the doctors if you keep throwing -" I didn't even get chance to finish my sentence before she stood up, punched me in the mouth and told me to shut the fuck up!

Our mother stood up and demanded to know what was going on. I looked at Matilda before I began, "You know how -" She threw herself at me, grabbing a handful of my hair. I smirked as I grabbed hold of her hair, tearing hair from each other and hurling insults. Kim tried dragging Matilda of me, something she needed to do quickly because she was hurting the fuck out of me.

Once she had got Matilda of me, she once again ask us what was going on. This time Matilda thought it was better to speak herself, "Its Poppy. She thinks I'm pregnant." I yawned, took the toast out off the toaster and picked up a knife, "No mum, I know she's pregnant." I was buttering the toast when I felt my hair being grabbed again. "Fucks sake Matilda." I replied before we began fighting for a second time that morning, "You, you need to learn to shut your fucking mouth!"

I knew she was pregnant, not only had I been there myself but I seemed to have touched a nerve, "What's up Matilda. Some lad gives you one and you find yourself pregnant. I guess you should have made him put something on the end of it you slag!" She laughed. Not a humorous laugh but an angry laugh. She threw me into the counter, slapped me and grabbed my hair again, "I'm guessing I'm taking after you. You had a baby with some no hopper!"

Fuck this I thought. Alright, call me anything, I really couldn't give a fuck but bring my Dave into it, my Dave who happened to be dead, then that's personal. Regardless of if your family or not. "Dave and I loved each other, we were gonna get married!" She laughed again, "Love? You don't know the fucking meaning of love. He's been dead how long and you've not spoken about him-" I threw her to the floor, got on top of her and punched her in the face as many times as I could before Kim dragged me off her.

"Girls, that's it! What the hell is going on between you two." We were both silent for a minute before Matilda replied, "Poppy's telling the truth. I'm pregnant." I couldn't believe the words I was hearing. It took the pair of us to slap, punch, rip each others hair out, hurl insults just for her to admit that she made a mistake and was pregnant, "I was raped." She whispered. I looked at her, "You're one sick little-" I stopped dead in my tracks when our eyes connected because deep down, I knew she was telling the truth.


	4. iv

A/N: Merry Christmas, hope everyone has a good new year (:

_Rape!_ My sister was a rape victim? She may have been a complete bitch but she didn't deserve to be raped to learn her lesson. I didn't know what to say I mean, I couldn't say sorry could I? _Sorry_ somehow didn't seem appropriate. We were silent, just staring at one another before Kim asked,

"Perhaps I should get Kim ready?"

I nodded muttered thanks and when she left, I turned to Matilda, "So.."

She sighed, "You can't tell mum!"

"She's gonna ask you anyway."

Matilda sighed again before she slowly walked towards the kettle, "I don't know who's the father is."

I frowned. She told me she was raped and now she's saying she doesn't know who the father is, "I don't get what you mean?"

"Six people have raped me Poppy, _six_and either one of them could be this baby's father."

_Six?_ Six men used my sister for their dirty needs? Just thinking about it made me feel physically sick. I bit my lower lip, sat down on the counter, folded my arms across my chest and looked at her.

"So what you gonna do?"

"I don't know Popz, I mean, I've always been against abortion but right now, that seems the only thing to do."

I nodded, "Want me to come with you?"

She shook her head, "No thanks. It's something I've got to do myself."

I smiled a little, "Okay but if you need me, just ask okay?" I touched her arm gently before I walked out of the kitchen.


	5. v

I went to my bedroom. Kim had got Kim dressed in the cutest yellow dress, white tights and her black boots. She looked adorable, so grown-up. It's hard to believe my little girl will be two soon. It only feels like yesterday I gave birth to her. I thanked my mum for getting her dressed and everything and she said it wasn't a problem. I told her I'll tell her what Matilda told me when little ears were out of the way.

I walked towards the wardrobe having a brief conversation with my daughter, picked up the black school skirt, my white blouse and threw them down on the bed. I undressed out of my pyjamas, pulled on my clean knickers and bra then put on my tights. I slid on my skirt, it was short and I knew my mother would say something about the length of it. She always told Matilda off for the length of hers.

I put on my blouse, buttoned it up except the two buttons at the top and sorted out my school tie. Finally, I put on my grey hoody and put my hair up in a ponytail. I wasn't pretty nor was I ugly, I guess you could say I was average. I had a wash and put my makeup on. I wore a bit of foundation, a lot of mascara and eyeliner and some lip gloss. Eventually at eight o clock I was ready to leave.

I held Kim's hand as we walked downstairs and as I sat her down on the bottom step, I went to the coat cupboard, got out my shoes and Kim's coat and went back to the stairs. I put my shoes on, Kim's coat and told Kim I was leaving now. She said she'll meet me at school and not to forget that I have a meeting with Mrs Fisher at half past eight. I nodded, I haven't forgotten.

I had a feeling I wasn't going to make the meeting as I had to get to the other side of town and back again in half an hour. I tried my best, Kim and I - we got to the nursery at twenty-five past eight. I knew I was never going to make it back to school in five minutes until I saw the bus. I jumped on, paid fifty pence and sat down near the front with the other Waterloo Road students.

I crossed one leg over the other, took out my blackberry and decided to play on a game. _Word mole _was the only decent game that was on my blackberry at the moment, I needed to download some more games. It wasn't long before the whole bus got off outside Waterloo Road. Walking along the pavement, I glanced at the clock and nearly had a heart attack. _8:42am._

I was twelve minutes late for my meeting and I began to walk a little fast through the gates and towards the main entrance. It was when I was inside that I didn't have a clue where I was heading. Luckily for me, Mrs Fisher was waiting for me.

"I'm guessing your Poppy?" I nodded, "Your la-"

"Late? I know. I apologize." I smiled a little.

She told me to follow her to her office and as I walked I pulled my skirt down slightly. I fiddled with the ring around my neck, my stomach tightening the longer we walked. One good thing, at least I didn't have any breakfast this morning. We got to the office and she told me to sit down. I did just that, crossed one leg over the other and stared at the desk.

"How long has it been since you were in school?"

"Roughly eighteen months although I did go to a school for teen mums for a while."

"How come you left?"

I shrugged. There was a lot of reasons why I left. One, the teenage mums in that place were thugs. They weren't like me. They weren't there for the right reasons. They were there because they had to be there. There were drugs and I didn't want to associate myself with that.

"Lets just say I didn't like it."

I didn't want to tell her _everything_. About the drugs and everything because I didn't want her to think I was someone bad. I was a good mum, honest! I bit my lower lip wondering what she was going to say next,

"What GCSE's are you interested in doing?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "I don't know. I haven't really given it much thought."


	6. vi

A/N: Oh dear! I totally forgot about this story, I apologize!

Did anyone else get nervous sitting in an office with a stranger? I know I did! I could feel my heart racing, my palms getting sweatier and I was trying to hold it together. I didn't want her to see how nervous I really was. For a second there was a silence between us before she asked, "Favourite subject?"

I bit my lower lip gently before I ran a hand through my hair. Usually I'd lie at this point and say I didn't have a favourite subject. I did but I was always too embarrassed to say what it was. I mean, I liked science! I guess that makes me a geek! "I'd say Chemistry Miss but all three sciences are good."

She smiled a little before asking, "And what are your predicated grades?"

I knew she'd be shocked once she found out what I was predicated at the end of year eleven. "D's, E's and U's. Miss, I know there bad but-"

"There not terrible sweetie, we've just got a lot of work to be done." She smiled warmly at me for a second and I smiled back.

"So, have you any thought on what you'll be taking for GCSE?"

I was silent again before I sighed, "Yes and no." I didn't wait until she asked, I just continued speaking, "French, Art, Triple Science and Drama."

"Good choice." She said with a smile.

I had to laugh, "Hard choice you mean."

She ignored me and didn't reply to my answer. Finally it was time to fill out the correct forms and documents. Mrs Fisher handed me my timetable and like anyone, I looked to see what lessons I had today. Bloody English with Mr Budgen. For fucks sake!

"I'm in Mr Budgen's set? You're having a laugh aren't you?"

"Is there a problem?"

I shrugged my shoulders before I answered, "You know how opinionated Mr Budgen is."

"Everyone is intilted to their own opinions." She replied before she showed me to the classroom.

Please tell me this was a bad dream?


	7. vii

I just stood there. I _really_ didn't want to go into English. I was thinking about causing an argument with Mrs Fisher but she seemed nice so I decided not too. I sighed deeply before I followed her to the classroom, opened the door and walked in. The minute I walked into class, everyone stared at me. My eyes scanned the classroom and I found a seat at the front, walked towards it and put my bag down on the desk. I pulled out my seat and sat down, I could still feel everyone looking at me.

"You are?" I heard Mr Budgen grumble and I stared at him, "I'm Poppy."

That's when I had a bright idea. Maybe if I was to cause trouble for Mr Budgen I'll be sent out.

"Not another one!" I heard him mumble and I said gently, "Do you have something to say Sir?"

I could hear the other students gasp. I didn't care. He was so rude!

"I beg your pardon?"

I lent over the table, my eyes still on Mr Budgen, "I heard you mutter Sir. Saying I was another one? Another one what?"

I got the feeling he didn't like my presence, "How dare you speak to me like that! Get out!"

I laughed, stood up and picked up my bag. It was then when I turned to Mr Budgen and said, "With pleasure."

I walked towards the door, opened it and walked out. I stood there for a moment before I took out my phone and walked down the corridor. I was in the middle of texting when I felt myself collide with somebody walking up the corridor. I looked up and saw the _cutest_ lad I had ever seen since Dave's death.


	8. viii

Ronan Burley stood before me. He was every girls dream. He was a fittie, proberly fitter then Finn Sharkey although there wasn't much competition, if you understand what I mean? We barely stopped to chat, both muttered our apologies and went our seperate ways. Except when I was walking away, he looked back at me.

I continued texting, updating my facebook status as I walked along the corridor. I didn't know what to do so I hung around the canteen for a bit before I decided to go to the shop. I had thirty minutes until my next lesson and if I timed it right, I'd be back before anyone would know I went.

Putting my bag down on the floor, I put on my coat and I was about to leave...

"Going somewhere?"

I spun around on my heels, my eyes falling upon a female teacher that I didn't recognise. I smirked, folded my arms across my chest and told the truth. I had always been brought up to tell the truth.

"I was hoping to sneak to the shop, buy some munch and get back before my second lesson."

"Aren't you suppose to be in a lesson?"

I smirked, "Yeah. I gone thrown out after about a second."

"Lesson?"

I unzipped my coat, "English. I love English actually."

I was almost certain I heard her mutter something so I just stared at her for a second. Eventually, I asked, "Did you just say something?"

She reacted in the same way Mr Budgen did. She told me to follow her and we'll go and see Mrs Fisher. I rolled my eyes, walked towards the door and told her it was a pleasure. I wanted to tell her everything, how rude her staff were but my "complaint." would never get very far. Teachers always stick together! Even if they're in the wrong.


	9. ix

"Wait here." She told me as we got to Mrs Fishers office.

"I'm not gonna do a runner am I?" I replied as I sat down.

Adults may be intelligent but they don't half say some ridiculous stuff sometimes. I crossed one leg over the other say as I sat on the chairs, a soft sigh escaped my lips before I untucked my necklace from under my blouse. I fiddled with it until I heard footsteps.

"Follow me!" I stood up, tucked my necklace into my blouse again and walked towards the office. As I passed the teacher, she told me I might want to drop the attitude that I have.

"I don't have an attitude darling." I laughed before I walked into the office. Mrs Fisher looked pissed to see me if I'm honest, not that I was bothered.

"Sit?" I pulled out the seat and sat down. The same seat I had sat on less than two hours ago to enroll into the school. I was now beginning to think returning to education was one big mistake.

"I've heard you haven't had a great morning." She began and I nodded. "I guess you could say that." I crossed one leg over the other and stared at her.

"Perhaps you could tell me why?"

"Is that a rhetorical question?" I presumed it wasn't so I explained, "I find your teachers rude."

"I beg your pardon?"

"I find your teachers disrespectful! You may think I'm rude but the problem is alot closer then you realise."

There was that uneasy silence between us until she asked gently,

"Maybe we should bring your mother in?"

I laughed, "If you think mentioning my mother is going to make me scared, your going to have a shock."

She didn't reply. Instead she stood up, walked towards the door and told the personal assistant to find Miss Campbell.


	10. x

"Maybe you should drop the attitude?"

"I would do, but I don't have an attitude so I can't."

I smirked as I folded my arms across my chest. We were silent for a while until I heard a knock and the door began to open.

"Poppy, what've you done?"

I smiled a little, "I haven't done anything!"

"You don't expect me to believe that do you?" She asked as she sat down on the chair beside me.

I didn't say anything. My eyes glanced around the office as Mrs Fisher began, "Poppy has been rude to a member of staff."

"I wasn't rude, I heard her mutter so I asked if she said something? How's that rude?" I sighed deeply.

Kim didn't say anything so Mrs Fisher spoke again, "Poppy was involved in another incident this morning when she was thrown out of her English lesson."

She was silent so I presumed it was my turn to speak, "I told her - sorry Mrs Fisher - that I couldn't go into Mr Budgen's English lesson because he's far too opinionated for my liking. However, Mrs Fisher said we all have our own opinions and there was nothing wrong with Mr Budgen."

"You put her with Grantly?" Kim replied quite shocked, "Surely that wasn't the best idea?"

I glanced at my mother and wondered why she was going to defend my actions. Mrs Fisher was her boss, she could sack her right?

"Are you questioning my judgement?" Mrs Fisher asked and Kim shook her head, "No! I was simply saying it wasn't the best idea."

I could sense the awkwardness in the room and I knew, if it carried on, an argument was going to happen.

"Look, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have been rude to Mr Budgen nor that female one. It won't happen again.."

Both Mrs Fisher and Kim looked at me and I looked down at the floor, "Can I go?"

Mrs Fisher nodded, "Poppy, take this as a warning. If it happens again, I'll have to give you a first strike."

I nodded, stood up and walked towards the door. I opened it, walked out and went to my second lesson of the day.


	11. xi

A/N: Questions from the June 07 OCR Science Paper (:

* * *

Second lesson of the day was Chemistry with Mr Mead. We - or rather they - had a test. He didn't want to test me because he said it wasn't fair but I told him I didn't mind. If I failed, I failed. Least I'd be able to pass the next test. He put the foundation paper on my table and I asked if I could borrow a pen, wrote my name on the front and turned the page.

_1) Crude oil is separated by ..._

I didn't have a clue so I quickly scribbled crude oil was separated by fractional distillation. I looked at the second part of question one and bit my lower lip anxiously. I read the question and glanced around at everyone else, they seemed to know what they were doing.

_ii) The separation of crude oil works because the useful substances have different ... _Boiling points?

_b) Describe an environmental problem that might occur after the accident _... Lack of fish.

_c) Write about cracking ... _What is "cracking?"

I had a feeling that this test was going to drag for a while.

_2a i) The small molecules used to make plastics are called ... _polymores.

_ii) The large molecules in plastics are called ... _monomers.

_b) A plastic is made when lots of ethane molecules are joined together. Write down the name of this plastic ... _No idea!

_c) Ethane (C2H4) is a hydrocarbon. Write down two elements found in a hydrocarbon. _Carbon and Hydrogen. Hardly rocket science (:

_d) Plastic objects are __non biodegradable, they are often thrown away. Explain the problem of disposing of these in landfill sites _... One, they take up a lot of room and two, they do not degrade.

_3a) When a fuel burns, it reacts with a gas from the air. Write down the name of this gas ... _Could it be Oxygen?

_b) Methane (CH4) is a hydrocarbon. It burns a lot in air. Two new substances are made. Write down the name of these two substances ... _carbon dioxide and hydrogen.

_c) If methane burns in a shortage of air, a poisonous gas is made. Write down the name of this gas ... _carbon monoxide?

_4a) Finish the table ... _22 - 16 = 6. Temperature change = 6.

_b) Which fuel gives out the most heat energy? ... _B

Finally I had finished the first part. I still had part B to go. I put down my pen on the table, put my hand up and said gently, "Sir?"

He came over to my table and I smiled gently, "Can I go to the toilet please?"

"Be quick." He whispered before he went back to his desk. I stood up, walked towards the door and sighed. Least I'd have a break for five minutes! I came back a short while later, sat down and picked up my pen. I glanced at the clock, I had just over forty minutes to complete the test. It was quite obvious that I probably wasn't going to finish the test but never mind! I don't think this test counted towards anything anyway.

_c) What is the name given for reactions that give out heat energy? ... _exothermic.

_d) Write down the molecular formula for ethanol ... _Huh?

I put my head down on the desk and muttered three words; _fuck my life._


	12. xii

I thought Section B would be harder then Section A as they usually give us the easy stuff then make it harder. But it was actually pretty easy. Easier then the first thats for sure.

_5a) Two substances are mixed with cement to make concrete. Write down the name of these two substances ... _Water and sand.

_b) Write down a balanced symbol equation for this reaction ... _Pfft, I couldn't do that.

_ii) Write down this time of reaction ... _Exthermic.

_6) Write down the name of the two main gases in the air ... _Nitrogen and Oxygen.

_b i) Which process removes carbon dioxide from the air? ... _Photosynthesis.  
_  
ii) Which process adds carbon dioxide to the air? ..._ Respiration.

_c) Write down one way in which sulfur dioxide is made ..._ Acid rain?

_7a) Write down the volume of gas made during the first 3 minutes ... _60cm3

_b) On the graph, sketch a line to show the results Paul should get ..._ I sketched just above his line.

_c) Write down two other things that Paul might change to make the reaction go faster _... No idea :|

_8a) Write down the name of a non-metal material used to make car parts ... _Rubber?

_b) Two substances are needed to make iron go rusty. Which two substances? ... _Water and Oxygen.

_c) What is meant by the word alloy? ... _Protector?

I glanced at the clock again, thirty minutes left.

_d) Explain why aluminium does not corrode? ... _It doesn't react with oxygen (:

_9a) Draw a straight line from each particle to the correct example? ... _atom-O2 ion-K+ molecule-Na

_b) Describe how chloride ions are made ... _They gain a particle therefore making it a negative.

_c i) A compound is 2 or more different ... chemically joined together ... _Atoms.

_ii) The atoms in a water molecule are held together by shared pairs of electrons. What is this type of bonding? ... _Covalent_? _

Twenty minutes left.

_10a) What is the name of the elements in group 1? ... _Halogens?

_b) Put Li, Na and K in order of reactivity ..._ Potassium, sodium and lithium.

_c i) Meena wants to identify metals. She uses a flame test. Describe how she does it ... _I'm guessing with a bunsen burner (:

_ii) Complete this table ..._ Sodium-yellow.

Fifteen minutes left.

_11a) Draw a straight line from each substance to its use ... _chlroine-killing bacteria in pools. sodiumchloride-antiseptic for cuts. iodine-food colouring.

_b) Write down the name of one other element in group 7 ... _Bromine.

_c) Write the word equation for the reaction between sodium and chlorine ... _Sodium + Chlorine - Sodium Chlorine.

_12a) Write down the test she should use and the result she should expect ... _No idea :|

_b) What is the name of the positive electrode? ... _Cathode.

_13a) What is the name of an ore that continues aluminium? ... _Bauxite.

_b) Write down the word equation for this reaction? ..._ Aluminium oxide - Aluminium + Oxygen.

Finished with five minutes to go! Booyah! I closed the paper, put my pen down and folded my arms across my chest, my eyes still on the clock. I was quite pleased with myself that I had finished the test, it wasn't every day I did that! Eventually, once the last person had finished, Mr Mead collected the papers and told us we could go to lunch. I picked up my bag and was about to exit the classroom when I heard Mr Mead speak,

"Poppy isn't it?"

I sighed. I really wanted my lunch. I turned around and smiled gently, "Yes sir."


	13. xiii

"How did you find the exam?"

"Hard." I admitted before I smiled softly, "But I would have found it easier if I had been in the lessons."

He smiled gently and it was then I noticed he had the most stunning blue eyes. I blushed a little,

"I'll mark your paper first." He said gently but I shook my head and responded, "You don't need to do that."

He just smiled and I asked if I could go now. He said I could and to come back at the end of the day if I wanted to find out what I got. I sighed, muttered I would and walked out of the classroom. I bit my lower lip and began to walk towards the canteen when I felt like I couldn't breathe. I couldn't describe it but it was like, someone had put their hands around my neck and they were strangling me. It lasted for about a minute or two before I felt normal.

But that's when it hit me. Was Matilda in trouble? I took out my phone, dialed the house number and waited for an answer. When she didn't pick up, I tried her mobile hoping and praying that nothing had happened to her. _Ring, ring, ring_. Answerphone! I knew what I had to do, I called mum and waited for her to pick up the phone.

"Poppy?"

"Mum, meet me by reception. It's an emergency."

"Poppy, what's the matter, your -"

"Just meet me by reception quickly please!"

I hung up, put my phone away and glanced around the corridor. I bit my lower lip, fear gripping my heart as I wondered about Matilda. Please god, please don't let anything happen to her. A few seconds later, Kim was there questioning what I was playing at.

"We've got to go home, it's Matilda..."

"What about Matilda?"

"I think somethings happened to Matilda."

I could see the panic in her eyes and we walked out of school, towards her car and none of us spoke to each other. Kim unlocked the car and we both got in. Usually the journey from school to home is five minutes, add twenty minutes when there's traffic but today, it seemed so much longer. We turned into our street and drove up the road a little towards our house. There was an ambulance outside and a lot of police. A bad sign right?

I got out the car and ran towards the house, the policeman was holding me back telling me I couldn't go near the house. I told him it was my house and my sister was in there. I looked at him and I could see it, I knew he was going to tell me Matilda was dead.

"She's dead isn't she?"

He nodded and I screamed. I hit him, I kept hitting him until I felt my mum wrap her arms around me, held me close and whispered, everything was going to be okay. But how? How was everything going to be okay? Matilda, my sister, Kim's auntie and her daughter was dead! I couldn't see the tears rolling down my mothers cheeks as she held me in her arms and ran her fingers through my hair.


	14. xiv

I couldn't believe she had killed herself. I knew she was unhappy but I didn't think she'd kill herself. Maybe if I had known that, I wouldn't have left her _alone. _I went back to school, I had two. There wasn't anything else I could do. I wiped the dry mascara from my cheeks and re-applied my makeup and entered school as normal as I could. I was over fifteen minutes late for French with Miss Lipsett and I knew she'd have a go at me. I thought about skiving but that would just make things even worse! I opened the door and bit my lower lip,

"Sorry I'm late." I muttered as I closed the door behind me and took my seat towards the back of the classroom. I sat there, twiddling my fingers not concentrating on anything we were doing until I heard her ask me a question.

"Poppy?"

I looked up, everyone else was looking at me and I sighed, "Yeah?"

"Did you hear what I just asked you?"

I shook my head. There was no point in lying. I heard her sigh before asking me again the question, "How do you say going to the cinema?"

I knew this one! I smiled a little before I replied, "Aller au cinema?"

"Oui Merci et Poppy?"

"Yes?"

"s'il vous plaît arrêter la rêverie!"

I nodded my head and rolled my eyes before I looked back down at the table. I couldn't wait for the lesson to finish, so I could go back to my mum. I actually wonder how she was coping. I mean, she found us both and now, tragically, she lost one of us. That couldn't be easy right? Eventually, what seemed like a lifetime, the lesson finished and I stood up.

"Poppy, can I have a word please?"

I nodded my head before I slowly walked towards her desk. She gestured me to sit down but I said I was fine standing up.

"Are you okay?"

I nodded, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You seem a little distracted..."

"I'm fine. I'd just say if I wasn't. Can I go now?"

She nodded and I left. As I was closing the door behind me, I didn't notice her look of concern. I chewed my lower lip as I walked along the corridor, not paying attention to anything. As I was making my way towards the lockers, I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. I took out my phone and answered the call from my mother,

"Mum?"

"Poppy, where are you?"

I sighed, "At school, where do you think I am?"

"I thought you had done something stupid!"

"Mum, I'd never do that. Not now, not with all this going on."

"You need to talk to Karen.."

"Mrs Fisher why?"

"Your going to be staying with her for a couple of days, until we can go back home."

"But what about you?"

"I'm staying with my mum.."

"Okay, I'll go and speak to Mrs Fisher now. Love you, bye!"

"Love you two, bye."

I ended the phone call, put the phone back in my pocket and slowly made my way towards Mrs Fisher's office.


	15. xv

"Janeece I need you to find Pop-" I heard Mrs Fisher asked before she noticed me in the doorway.

I chewed my lower lip hard as I walked slowly towards her, my arms folded across my chest and I followed her into the office.

Once the door was closed, there was that awkward silence between the pair of us before she began, "Poppy I'm so so-"

"Sorry? You've got nothing to be sorry about. You never made her take her life did you?"

There was that awkward silence again before she gestured me to sit down. I sat down next to her, a sigh escaped my lips.

"If ... If I knew she was suicidal ... if I knew she was even thinking about it, I would've stayed with her."

She touched my arm gently, "You can't blame yourself. You weren't to know."

"But if ..."

"But nothing, you couldn't prevent it Poppy."

I didn't believe her, I still felt like there was more I could have done.

"I've got to go and collect Kim Jr." I said gently as I stood up, "I appreciate you letting us to stay for a few days."

She said it wasn't a problem and I left to go and pick up Kim Jr. I wasn't ready to tell her about Matilda but I knew I had to tell her at some point. She'd ask about Matilda and she knew if I was lying to her. She was far too grown up for her age. I showed the driver my bus pass from earlier, sat at the back of the bus and lost myself in a world of my own. The bus journey seemed twice as long as the way there this morning and eventually, it was my stop. I got off and walked towards the nursery.

I was ten minutes late and as I pressed the bell, I saw Kim's little face pressed against the window. She always made me smile regardless of how rubbish I felt inside. I apologized for been late, zipped up her coat and put her gloves and scarf on and fastened her into her pram.

"Mummy?" I heard her ask and I replied, "Yes sweetheart?"

"Can I have smarties?" I laughed softly and told her that she can. I don't usually give her sweets, all those E numbers would make her hyper as hell! But seeing on the circumstances, it seemed fair to let her have a treat. As I pushed the buggy towards the shop, I asked how her day at nursery was. She told me she liked it but there was a boy that was horrible to her. I told her not to let him worry her, horrible people don't make friends. She seemed a little happier after that. I went into the shop, brought a four pack of smarties and paid the shop-keeper before making our way towards the bus station. I got to stand B, Kim's mouth turning a mixture of colours and I still couldn't help but smile.

We got on the bus, most people were looking or rather staring. I was in my school uniform with a child in a pram, I knew what they were thinking. That I was no better than the other teenager girls who found themselves pregnant. I wasn't like them, I was much better because I put my daughter first. Above my own needs! It was just after three forty-five when we arrived back at Waterloo Road, Kim was already going through her second tube of smarties. Tonight was going to be a nightmare to get her to sleep. But at least she was going to sleep better then me.


	16. xvi

Kim fell asleep about nine but I couldn't sleep, no matter how hard I tried. For about an hour, I sat on the floor, legs crossed watching Kim sleeping. I still hadn't told her that Matilda wasn't coming back, she was buying my excuse that Matilda was working but I knew, I knew I had to tell her soon. I couldn't keep lying to her, it really didn't seem right. Standing up, I sighed and walked out of the living room and towards the kitchen.

"Miss?"

I said gently as I stood at the door, folded my arms across my chest.

"You can call me Karen you know."

I shook my head, "It'll be too confusing."

There was a silence between us but this time it wasn't awkward.

"Couldn't sleep?" I asked, biting my lower lip as I walked slowly into the kitchen.

She didn't say anything so I kinda took it as a yes, "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure go ahead."

"How do you stay so strong even if your world is falling apart?"

She didn't say anything for a moment before she replied, "Is that what you think? That I'm strong?"

I nodded and she sighed a little before she sat down at the table, "I break sometimes.."

"Doesn't everyone at some point? I just feel like, I'm never strong. I feel like I break constantly."

I fiddled with Dave's ring, feeling a little awkward. I chewed my lower lip before I heard her say,

"Your a mother right? Been a mother isn't easy, I think we both agree on that. You are strong, perhaps you don't realise it."

I smiled a little before I blurted out, "How do I tell her? How do I tell her Auntie Maddie is never coming home?"

"You'll find a way, you have two.."


	17. xvii

I couldn't sleep. I sat there on the floor, my eyes firmly on Kim. Truth was, I was scared of something happening to her. First Dave then Matilda. Who next I wonder? My mother, Kim or someone much closer to me then I ever realised? I fiddled with Dave's ring, silent tears rolled down my cheeks, was I really that evil that I needed to be punished?

I sighed deeply as I picked up my mobile phone and glanced at the time. It was little over four in the morning and I had to be up for school in less than three hours. Pulling my knees to my chest, I picked up my phone, found the memo pad and began to write everything I felt.

_I wasn't the easiest person to love.  
I wasn't the easiest person to get along with.  
I wasn't the prettiest person nor  
the funniest person you could have ever met._

_I was me and you were you._  
_You were insecure & I was perfect.  
You and I - we were everything.  
I guess it was always you and me baby._

_You kissed my cheek, kissed my bump;  
Told me goodbye and you'll see me tonight.  
You got in the car with your friends,  
Your last ride, your last moments._

_You crashed. You died. You left us.  
Now I'm alone & a single mother.  
Everyday I miss you a little bit more.  
__Every day I love you that little bit more._

I bit my lower lip as I saved it and began to write one about Matilda.

_We met as strangers on the train.  
Both running away from our past.  
Both found safety in the other.  
Both found our true identities._

_We were long lost sisters.  
I didn't like that & I left.  
I realised how selfish I was,  
So I tracked you down._

_Sisters & Best friends.  
Nothing could come between us.  
You could tell me anything  
& You know I'd never tell anyone._

_Why couldn't you tell me?  
Why did you leave me?  
Why did you let me go through the pain?  
Why did you do this to us?_

I threw my phone on the floor, brought my knees back to my chest and stared in space for a while. I don't know how long I was there for but it seemed a couple of hours. Eventually, I heard Kim stirring and my eyes quickly fell upon her. She turned over slightly and went to sleep.

As gently as I could, I gently tucked her brunette hair behind her ear. I smiled gently before I stood up, walked towards my phone and picked it up. Looking at the time, I realised it was time for us to wake up now.

"Kim?" I whispered as I gently shook her awake, "It's morning.."


	18. xviii

She sat up, rubbed her eyes and looked around the living room.

"Momma, wheres Auntie Maddy?"

She stared at me with those beautiful brown eyes and I sighed,

"Sweetie..do you remember that place where daddy is?"

She nodded and placed a hand on her chest, "Here?"

"No sweetie. Heaven..." I wondered if she'd remember.

She nodded and I whispered, "Auntie Maddy has gone to heaven two."

She was silent for a moment before tears began to roll down her cheeks.

I pulled her into a hug and she whispered, "Will you ever die mummy?"

I hugged her tightly, kissed the top of her head and replied, "No. I'll never die beautiful.."

"Promise?" I smiled softly, "I promise baby.."

* * *

Kim was sat crossed legged on the living room floor, her eyes focused on Dora the Explorer that was on the television.

"I'll be in the kitchen if you need me.." I told her and she nodded not taking her eyes of the screen.

I went into the kitchen and it was only out of sight from Kim that I burst into tears. I didn't expect anyone to be in the kitchen.

"Are you okay?" I wiped away my tears and nodded my head, "I'm fine.."

I smiled a little at the girl who wasn't much older than me and said gently, "It's Jess isn't it?"

She nodded, "I'm sorry to hear about your sister.."

I shrugged my shoulders, "It's fine."

There was a silence between us before she asked, "Were you close?"

I sniffed and replied, "I guess so. I mean, she could tell me anything."

Again there was another silence before she smiled a little, "I best go and get ready.."

I nodded, "It was nice talking to you." She smiled before she left the kitchen.

* * *

I began crying again. I don't know how long I was stood there with tears rolling down my cheeks but it must have been a while,

"Mummy!" I heard Kim scream and my mothers instinct kicked in, "Sweetie whats up?"

She looked at me in thought before she gently touched my tears and wiped them away, "Momma, why are you crying?"

I sighed, "Momma misses daddy and Auntie Maddy.."

She wrapped her arms around me and whispered, "It'll get better momma.."

And hearing that from my daughter made me cry even harder.

* * *

**a/n: **if you've read, please review(L)


	19. xix

I sent Kim to nursery even though she should have been here with me. I didn't want her to dwell on her feelings, instead I wanted her to go to nursery and be "happy". As happy as she possibly could in a situation like this. I decided to go to school, I couldn't bare the thought of not going. At least I was able to "escape" for a couple of hours.

The minute I walked into school, I felt everyones eyes on me. Some people who knew my sister came up to me and said they were sorry for what had happened. I just nodded. What could you say? I bit my lower lip as I made my way down the corridor heading towards the lockers.

As I reached my locker, I took a deep breath and opened it. I took out the books I needed for my first lesson and slammed it shut to see Lauren Andrews and Sambuca Kelly stood there. There was an awkward silence between us before Lauren said gently, "We're sorry to hear about your sister..."

"Yeah.." Sambuca replied, "If there's anything we can do, we'll do it.."

"Thanks.." I muttered, "I appreciate it.." I smiled a little before I walked towards my lesson. I had English with Mr Budgen. I didn't fancy going, he would no doubt have a sarcastic comment to say about Matilda. I arrived early and as I sat by the radiator, I took out my mobile phone and looked through my photos.

There was a recent photo of Matilda and I. I didn't realise it until now, but we did look alike. We weren't identical yet we shared the same characteristics but we were forever creating our own identities. It still didn't seem real that I would never see my sister again. I _needed_ my sister.

* * *

I was sat there for about ten minutes before I overheard this lad say I was the sister of the slut who topped herself. I left my bag where I was sat, marched up to him and shouted,

"Do you want to say that again?"

He looked at me, "I said, your the sister of the slu-."

Before he could even finish his sentence, my fist collided with his mouth. A few gasps were heard before he put his hands on me and slammed me into the wall. "Does that make you feel better?" I smirked before I kneed him in the bollocks and smacked him round the head again. I walked off, picked up my bag and slowly walked down the corridor.

Matilda wasn't a slut was she? I guess I'll never know. Even though she was my twin sister I realised she was nothing more than a stranger to me. I sighed before I decided that I was going to go home. That's if the police had finished with the house.

It was a simple suicide case. Open and closed right? How wrong could I be!

_

* * *

_

**a/n:** if you read please review(L)  
also, if anyone has blackberry messenger please add me: 239B6932


	20. xx

I sat on the steps of the entrance to school, still debating to leave or not when I decided if I went home I'd just be thinking about Matilda constantly. I stood up, walked inside school again and made my way back towards English. I was ten minutes late but he didn't seem to mind as he didn't say anything. I walked in, sat down at my seat and didn't say a word to anyone.

We were studying Romeo and Juliet at the moment, a beautiful tale with a tragic ending. We finished the novel today and he said next lesson, we could watch the film. Of course, we had homework, (when didn't we!). Our homework was to write a different ending to Romeo & Juliet, anyway we wanted. I already knew what I was planning on doing but you'll have to wait and see.

As I was packing away, Mr Budgen said he was sorry to hear about Matilda. I nodded and muttered thanks. I picked my bag up, put it over my shoulder and walked out of the classroom. I was walking down the corridor minding my own business when I heard someone shout something. Turning around, I saw some fat girl running up to me and I just knew, she was looking for a fight.

"You talking to me?" I shouted as I dropped my bag on the floor.

"Yeah I am!" She replied, her face now in mine.

I laughed at her, "I don't even know who you are.."

"You don't need to know who I am. You started on my brother."

"I think you'll find he started on me."

She put her hands on me and shoved me into the wall, "Touch him again and I'll have your eyes out, k?"

I laughed again, "I'm shittin' myself love."

"You should be.." She turned to walk away when I grabbed a fistful of hair and dragged her down the corridor.

"Not so hard now, are you?" I asked as I let go off her hair and threw her into the wall, "Wanna try that again?"

"That didn't even hurt.." She laughed but I could tell she was embarrassed.

"Next time I'll throw you doing the fuckin' stairs.."

Just as I threatened her, Mr Clarkson happened to be stood there.

"Poppy, Mrs Fisher's office now!"

I picked up my bag and turned to the girl who now had a smirk on her face, "This isn't over."

"Poppy!"

I turned to look at Mr Clarkson before I stormed off to Mrs Fisher's office, muttering that he was a prick under my breath.


	21. xxi

"She started it Miss.." I protested as I folded my arms across my chest.

"Do you honestlyexpect me to believe that? A girl in year nine attack-"

"What's age got to do with it? She stormed up to me and shoved me into the wall." I interrupted, a sigh escaping my lips.

"Perhaps coming to school so soon after your sisters death wasn't a good idea.."

I couldn't believe she was trying to say that I was going around beating up people because of my sisters tragic death.

"Your wrong! This has nothing to do with me grieving for my sister. This is because of some stupid slag who wanted a fight and picked me!"

I picked up my bag, stormed towards the door and pulled it back with such force that it crashed into the filing cabinet behind.

"Poppy!" I slammed the office door behind me, ignoring Mrs Fisher shouting at me to get back there.

_"That's it_._"_ I thought, "_I've got to get away from here."_

_

* * *

_

I was going to runaway _again._ Instead of facing the mess, the hurt and the confusion inside, I was running away.

That was the only thing I am good at. I sat down and wrote a letter to my daughter, this time she couldn't come with me.

.

_To mummy's princess;_

_Mummy's gone away for a while. Don't worry, she hasn't gone away forever just a couple of weeks. You see, ever since Daddy died mummy hasn't been the same and now Auntie Maddy has gone to heaven, she needs to go on holiday to get better. Don't cry sweetheart, keep smiling because your beautiful. I'll be back soon. _

_Promise._

_Lots of love Mummy. xx_

.

Just a crappy letter, that's all I could give her. I left it on the table then I went. I left and I didn't look back.

I couldn't look back. I just had to keep _running..._

_

* * *

_

A/N: Sorry for the long delay in updating.  
I had a case of writers block. (:


	22. xxii

I couldn't do it. I couldn't leave. If I could, what kind of mother did that make me? She needed me and I was planning on running away. I went back, picked up the letter and tore it in half. I threw it in the dustbin and hoped that nobody would ever find it. Truth was, I was ashamed of myself. I went for a walk and ended up by the river. I sat on the riverbank, legs crossed and just stared at the water.

I wished I had never came here. Maybe if I hadn't moved here, maybe Matilda would be still alive. I believed it was my fault. I was a bad person and bad people needed to be punished. God was punishing me by killing my sister and who was he going to kill next, my mother or my daughter?

As I sat there, I moved my eyes for a split second from the water and looked opposite the river bank. Someone, a boy was sat on the other side. I recognised him as the lad I had bumped into when I had left Mr Budgen's lesson. He caught me looking and flashed me a smile. Embarrassed that I had been caught "checking him out" I dipped my eyes back on the murky water. It was a good while later that I looked up again and he was gone. I sighed deeply before I heard a voice that scared the hell out of me.

"I thought you'd look back over there." I turned my head to the side and sat there was Ronan Burley. I couldn't help but smile, even if I didn't know him.

"It's Ronan right?" I asked turning my attention back to the water.

"Yup, Poppy isn't it?"

I nodded. There was that silence between us before he replied, "I'm sorry to hear about Matilda."

"News travels fast around Rochdale ey?"

"Especially at Waterloo Road. There's no such thing as secrets."

He joked and I couldn't help but smile a little, "So, what are you doing here?"

"I come here to relax sometimes, you?"

I shrugged. Today was the first time I had been here so I replied, "I was thinking."

"About?"

I turned to look at him in the eye, "Your nosey.." He smiled and I felt like I had butterflies in my stomach, "I was thinking about my daughter."

I think it took him a while to register what I had said, "You've got a daughter?" He asked appearing interested.

I nodded, "She's called Kim and before you ask, yes I named her after my mother. She's two and a half, her father died before she was born."

"Sorry.." He was silent for a second, "Does she look like you or her dad?"

"Her dad that's for sure except she has my nose and my cheek structure."

I didn't realise it but a tear was rolling down my cheek, "Hey, your crying.." He said gently as he wiped the tear away with his thumb.

"Thanks.." I muttered before I stood up, "I best be going.."

"At least let me walk you home.."

I laughed, "I'm hardly going to get murdered. It's broad daylight."

"Still, you can never be too careful."

I rolled my eyes, "Okay.." He stood up and we began to walk back home.

But I felt strange. I felt like I was _falling_ for this guy but I couldn't be right?

* * *

a/n: Pretty please review, I'd love to know what you think.(L)


	23. xxiii

A/N: I have no idea what A-levels Ronan is doing so I've made them up (:

* * *

"So, what A-levels are you doing?" I asked attempting to break the ice between us.

"Spanish, Business and ICT." He replied, "What GCSE's are you doing?"

"I'm doing French, Art, Triple Science and for some reason, Drama." I laughed.

I wonder now why I chose Drama. I was hardly the acting type, "Here we are.." He said and I looked up at the house.

"Thank you." I thanked him, a soft smile upon my face, "You're welcome."

We were silent for a while, our eyes connecting before I broke the silence, "I guess I'll see you around then."

He nodded, "Yeah you will, see you around."

He turned around and began to walk up the garden path. I pushed open the front door, walked in and went to the living room. Kim was sat crossed legged on the floor, her eyes glued to the television. I smiled softly before I began to feel guilty over my earlier letter. Walking into the kitchen, I chewed my lower lip as I saw Mrs Fisher sat at the kitchen table.

"Miss, I'm sorry about earlier.."

"It's okay."

"No it's not. I mean, I was proper bang out of order. I shouldn't have spoken to you like that."

"Where did you go?"

"I came here, I actually considered running away. Getting on the next train from Rochdale and just leaving.."

"So why didn't you?"

I didn't reply for a while. I walked towards the cupboard, took out a glass and ran the cold tap. Once the glass was half full, I turned the tap off and turned to Karen,

"Because of Kim.." I whispered as I dropped the glass on the floor. I just looked at Karen, tears rolling down my cheeks, "I couldn't leave her.."


	24. xxiv

**a/n**: oh my god i apologise for not updating this sooner.

* * *

Each tiny shard of glass that smashed against the floor, represented my broken heart.

"I'm the only one Kim has. Everyone else around her dies."

I said calmly as I threw the broken glass in the bin. I didn't make eye contact with Karen, for some reason it seemed easier not too.

"Everyone?" Karen repeated and I nodded, "Pretty much. Dave, her father died when I was pregnant, her grandmother when she was four months old and now, and now Matilda."

"Sorry to hear that." She said gently and I shrugged, "Stuff likes this happens, you get over it."

"But you haven't."

I ignored her comment because deep down, she touched a nerve. It was true, I hadn't dealt with the people around me dying and every time someone died, I'd plaster on a smile and pretend everything was okay. It had worked every single time, except now..

"Poppy?"

I turned around, "What?"

"You need help."

"You think so? I think people need to get off my back. The sooner they do, the better I'll be."

I heard her get up from the table and walk slightly closer, "You know, if you keep pushing away the people who care about you; you'll be on your own. Is that what you want?"

"Just shut up okay? Shut up!" I stormed out of the kitchen into the landing and began to walk towards the door. Opening the door, I was about to leave when I heard a fragile voice behind me, "Please don't leave me mummy.."

I closed the door and turned around. Standing behind me, tears rolling down her cheeks was my two year old daughter.

"I'll never leave you sweetie, I promise."

And as she wrapped her arms around my neck, I came to an important decision.

"Sweetie, go in the living room; mummy will be in shortly."

And as I watched her head of the living room, I made my way back into the kitchen, "Please help me Karen.."

* * *

**a/n:** if you like it enough to favourite, please could you leave a review with it.


	25. xxv

**a/n**: oh god, i've had writer's block & i've lost interest in waterloo road at the moment.

**chapter twenty-five**  
( final chapter )

.

It was easier to say I need help.

I hadn't spoken about my feelings for years, there are still things about my childhood that I haven't spoken about but I know if I don't open up to someone soon; I'll do something stupid. If I do that, I'll lose the one person that means the world to me and that is my daughter.

I've a messed up soul that's for sure.

I runaway from my horrible life in London, away from an _(adoptive)_ mother who was evil and an _(adoptive)_ father who didn't think twice about beating me. By chance I meet my _(twin)_ sister and I come to Rochdale. We're a happy family but _(secrets)_ tear us apart when Matilda dies.

I've got one person close to my heart and if I can prevent anything happening to her, I will do.

It was a fortnight ago when I returned to school for the second time since Matilda's death. It hadn't changed, it just felt more strange - _(if that was even possible?)_ I told myself that for the next couple of months I was going to work hard, turn my life around and gain some qualifications.

'Because I owe Mrs Fisher that at least.

Even if in August of this year and I come out of that assembly hall with ten U's, I wouldn't care because at least I can say, hand on hand; I tried my hardest for my daughter and I. And failing your exams isn't the end of the world, after all - there's always college.

But like anything, life was never straight forward and as I'm more determined to create a future for Kim and I, my _(devious)_ past is pulling back into the world I'm so desperate to escape from.

So expect it all in the sequel; lies, drama and bombshells.

My teenage years are about to get ten times harder and I'll be faced with my toughest challenge yet.

.

**a/n:** so there you go, that's the final chapter of this story. like usual, i'll be writing a sequel because i'm not finished with poppy yet.  
the first chapter of the sequel will be up either this week or next. not to forget, i'm going to be editing this at some point, just taking things out & what not, don't worry though as nothing major will change(: once again, thank you for my lovely reviewers, each review makes me happy and inspires me to write more. big hugs; gemmii.(L)


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